As I give thought to my experiences at school/work yesterday, I continue to ponder the question I've given much thought and consideration to over the years in hopes of changing my perspective regarding whether man is inherently good or evil. Sadly my feelings remain the same, that when all is said and done, we are evil creatures. In order to clarify meaning of this, interestingly and ironically four letter word, I turn my sights to Wikipedia for clarification, as I often do.
Evil is a broad term used to indicate a negative moral or ethical judgment, often used to describe intentional acts that are cruel, unjust, or selfish. Evil is usually contrasted with good, which describes intentional acts that are kind, just, or unselfish.
Having made this clarification I continue my thoughts. As most of you know I am an educator at an institution for higher learning. I like to describe it that way because I "hope" individuals seek to push themselves beyond their perceived limitations for the purpose of obtaining knowledge they can actually utilize in their lives in their enduring pursuit of "happyness" (NOTE: not a misspelling). Selfishly speaking, or evilly if you will, I "hope" to be a tool of inspiration to my students and "give" them something that will benefit their lives.
Apparently some time late last week, a student met with the department chair to raise concerns ... fuck the niceties ... COMPLAIN about me. My boss, Colleen, asked to meet with me Monday after class to discuss the issues that were raised. Before I proceed, let me make my first assertion that begs the question, why? If in fact, you had paid to take a 16 week class and felt that it was not benefiting you, you weren't learning, you weren't being treated fairly, or you simply weren't getting enough bang for you buck, would you not attempt to resolve the situation prior to the 15th week of class? My assertion is this: This student went into the chair's office knowing full well they had not lived up to their responsibilities and had therefore, not earned the grade they had anticipated by skating by effortlessly. Now, rather than accept reesponsibility for themselves they wish to bitch so as to project their failure onto someone else.
From day one of the semester I have had two students who chat endlessly through each and every class. Not only do they chat, but one of them periodically interjects flirtatious comments as I lecture, which I find to be not only inappropriate and completely disrespectful, but a foundation for sexual harassment. Over the course of the last 15 weeks I only remember one class period where I did not have to ask them in some way, shape, or form to tone it down. This particular day one of them was absent.
As the semester progressed two additional students decided to join the party and began sitting in the general area of the initial pair. At this point I felt like I was totally losing control of the classroom environment altogether. On one particular day I had simply had enough, stopped lecturing (standing there silently), and waited to see if they would notice. They didn't. Finally I said, "If you can't stop being disruptive I'm going to have to ask you to leave." One of them, approximately 6'4" and burly, got up to leave the room; to which I replied, "Thank you." I was being sincere, not facetious; nonetheless he slammed the door behind him. The next class period he apologized to me, however indirectly, saying, "I shouldn't have done that." I told him if he did what he felt was necessary he shouldn't feel bad about it.
One of the group of four stayed after class a couple weeks ago to ask me a question. I had my grading sheet in front of me while sitting down to speak with her. She interrupted our conversation, pointed to the grading sheet, and asked, "Are those zeros?" [recorded by her name for attendance and participation that day]. I said, "They are." She just stared at me as if she was in some sort of shock and then left the classroom.
I assign points for attendance and participation and indicate so on the syllabus, which I consider to be a contract between my students and I. It clearly says:
Participation: Class participation points are based on attendance and the quality of your contributions to class discussions, learning objective assignments, and completed presentation evaluation forms. Just as you would not receive points for turning in blank sheets of paper, you will not receive participation points simply by being physically present. You are expected to attend class, participate, and have a positive influence on class discussions and activities. You are responsible for preparing yourself for class by studying what will be covered according to the schedule. The following three elements are evaluated in order to calculate participation points:
1. How many classes did you actually attend?
2. Did you actively discuss the material during those class sessions?
3. Did you have a positive influence on class activities and discussions or did you disrupt the class and make learning more difficult for other students?
*NOTE: ATTENDANCE AND PARTICIPATION POINTS ARE TRIPPLED ON PRESENTATION DAYS TO ENCOURAGE AUDIENCE ATTENDANCE.
The remaining complaints seemed to be a lengthy list of character traits a.k.a. teaching style; one being my swearing in class was unprofessional and offensive. In my lecture regarding the First Amendment I make reference to the "Fuck Viet Nam" T-shirt case that went all the way up to the U.S. Supreme Court only to receive the Court's opinion there was no other word in the English language that would convey the meaning this individual was attempting to communicate and the "inflammatory language" was in fact covered by our First Amendment rights. I understand living in a highly populated Mormon community this is likely to offend some students. Regardless, the lesson is much more important to me than whether or not they choose to take offense; and if only they pay attention due to the shock value, at least I have succeeded in explaining not only the First Amendment, but also the power words have on shaping audience perception (another of my many lectures).
Anyway, I could go on forever, but won't. I was deeply hurt by the fact that this student hadn't found any of the information I have imparted throughout the sememster beneficial. I am sad that my efforts and energy have been in vain. I am disappointed that when given the choice to learn or not, regardless of whether you agree, people still choose to close their minds to the multitude of possibilities that exist in the universe. And I am angry that it would even occur to a student to attempt to sabotage an instructor's credibility rather than accept responsibility for their own actions.
Tomorrow I plan to enter the classroom and write on the board, ""For every action there is a consequence." I will say nothing until the trouble children begin their daily routine of chit chatting and heckling. The I will say, pointing to each of them, "You, you, you, and you, please leave my classroom. Feel free to stop at the department chair's office at the end of the hallway on your way out." If they try to bully me further or put up a fight of any sort I'll say, "I may be small in stature, but not on courage." (Special thanks to Gay for helping with my wording! ... I love you girl!)
Thanks for reading! I'll make updates to this blog if I learn anything more over the remaining three class periods before the semester if finished once and for all.
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