After reading yet ONE MORE article on Dating Deal Breakers, I thought it best to hurl/verbally vomit some of what I read and some of my thoughts onto the screen for your entertainment, perspectives, or total disregard ... whichever you please ...
DEAL BREAKER: A non-negotiable in the dating world for the purpose of potentially becoming involved in a relationship. A deeply ingrained mindset, quality, attitude, belief or issue a person has that simply will not fit with your lifestyle or otherwise is intolerable to you.
I'm NOT talking about little things that can be simply addressed and slight alterations that can be made to accommodate both parties, like "they make a funny noise when they chew." I'm talking about a particular characteristic that, once revealed, makes you realize there is NO WAY the two of you can have a future together.
Now every person must have their own PERSONAL set of DEAL BREAKERS (although women are likely more consciously aware of their "list." Here are a few in my communications with others, dating experiences, and reading that I've found to be pretty universal:
* They have a criminal record. (I've actually had guys get offended when I ask them this question. I don't understand, as I am willing to answer any question I dare to ask.)
* He's a major mama's boy. (A man only has room in his heart for one woman ... although most have room for many of them in their bed ... Certainly you want someone who loves and respects his mother; but when your honor is at stake do you really want the added pressure of wondering where the chips will fall?)
* He has a history or has shown a tendency toward ANY kind of abuse (mental, emotional, physical).
* He's got anger issues (with or without the abuse ... NO ONE SHOULD EVER HAVE TO FEEL BELITTLED OR INTIMIDATED)!
* He shows a complete lack of manners (When you're on a date and you actually feel the urge to reach across the table and cut their food for them, that MIGHT be a sign you should have stayed home).
* He's terminally immature. (Age itself isn't an issue. However, the ability to have an intellectually stimulating and emotionally appropriate conversation IS an issue.)
* He's emotionally unavailable. (I was in one relationship for far too long that taught me a very important lesson. It is MUCH more painful to feel alone WITH someone than it is to feel lonely alone. When you're feeling lonely alone you can actually do something about it, like get together with friends.)
* You don't feel an ounce of chemistry with him. (It's either there or it isn't. Sometimes you can feel it the first time you hear their voice, sometimes the moment you see them, and still others after there's some type of physical interplay. If you're not "feeling it" by the second date, there's really no point in wasting each other's time.)
* You're hopelessly incompatible with one another. (You want kids someday, he never does; or he's mid-40s and still hopes to have kids and you've already done your part to contribute to the 2.5 American-family children statistics; or you want to marry a Jew, he's Catholic, etc...)
* He cheats on you. (DUH!!!)
* He's married. (DUH!!!)
I would love to hear other perspectives on deal breakers.
In addition to the list above, here are a couple of mine:
* He's Narcissistic and/or controlling.
* He can't just have fun with you whether it's a card game, sports, or a conversation regarding a political issue because EVERYTHING IS a competition and HE MUST ALWAYS CRUSH YOU!
* He's Passive/Aggressive and you're constantly trying to figure out what's going on in his head to the point it becomes exhausting!
* He's afraid of your ex. If this is the case be sure to give him your ex's address, pretending it's yours and give him a date and time to show up with a bottle of red wearing something sexy ... midnight is usually a fairly safe bet! If you're really twisted be in the area with a video camera to watch the fire works, and if you have even an ounce of empathy left within your being, a mobile phone to dial 911 if things get really ugly. LMAO!
DEAL BREAKER: A non-negotiable in the dating world for the purpose of potentially becoming involved in a relationship. A deeply ingrained mindset, quality, attitude, belief or issue a person has that simply will not fit with your lifestyle or otherwise is intolerable to you.
I'm NOT talking about little things that can be simply addressed and slight alterations that can be made to accommodate both parties, like "they make a funny noise when they chew." I'm talking about a particular characteristic that, once revealed, makes you realize there is NO WAY the two of you can have a future together.
Now every person must have their own PERSONAL set of DEAL BREAKERS (although women are likely more consciously aware of their "list." Here are a few in my communications with others, dating experiences, and reading that I've found to be pretty universal:
* They have a criminal record. (I've actually had guys get offended when I ask them this question. I don't understand, as I am willing to answer any question I dare to ask.)
* He's a major mama's boy. (A man only has room in his heart for one woman ... although most have room for many of them in their bed ... Certainly you want someone who loves and respects his mother; but when your honor is at stake do you really want the added pressure of wondering where the chips will fall?)
* He has a history or has shown a tendency toward ANY kind of abuse (mental, emotional, physical).
* He's got anger issues (with or without the abuse ... NO ONE SHOULD EVER HAVE TO FEEL BELITTLED OR INTIMIDATED)!
* He shows a complete lack of manners (When you're on a date and you actually feel the urge to reach across the table and cut their food for them, that MIGHT be a sign you should have stayed home).
* He's terminally immature. (Age itself isn't an issue. However, the ability to have an intellectually stimulating and emotionally appropriate conversation IS an issue.)
* He's emotionally unavailable. (I was in one relationship for far too long that taught me a very important lesson. It is MUCH more painful to feel alone WITH someone than it is to feel lonely alone. When you're feeling lonely alone you can actually do something about it, like get together with friends.)
* You don't feel an ounce of chemistry with him. (It's either there or it isn't. Sometimes you can feel it the first time you hear their voice, sometimes the moment you see them, and still others after there's some type of physical interplay. If you're not "feeling it" by the second date, there's really no point in wasting each other's time.)
* You're hopelessly incompatible with one another. (You want kids someday, he never does; or he's mid-40s and still hopes to have kids and you've already done your part to contribute to the 2.5 American-family children statistics; or you want to marry a Jew, he's Catholic, etc...)
* He cheats on you. (DUH!!!)
* He's married. (DUH!!!)
I would love to hear other perspectives on deal breakers.
In addition to the list above, here are a couple of mine:
* He's Narcissistic and/or controlling.
* He can't just have fun with you whether it's a card game, sports, or a conversation regarding a political issue because EVERYTHING IS a competition and HE MUST ALWAYS CRUSH YOU!
* He's Passive/Aggressive and you're constantly trying to figure out what's going on in his head to the point it becomes exhausting!
* He's afraid of your ex. If this is the case be sure to give him your ex's address, pretending it's yours and give him a date and time to show up with a bottle of red wearing something sexy ... midnight is usually a fairly safe bet! If you're really twisted be in the area with a video camera to watch the fire works, and if you have even an ounce of empathy left within your being, a mobile phone to dial 911 if things get really ugly. LMAO!
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